041Culture writer Mvume Ndimba takes a hilariously honest deep dive into what happens when you let an AI analyse your life and your work. From being humbled by ChatGPT’s 7/10 rating to questioning the soul of our tech overlords, Ndimba explores the benefits and awkward realities of living (and writing) alongside artificial intelligence. It’s smart, sharp, and will have you side-eyeing your phone the next time it autocorrects you.
AI has long been the boogeyman of our generation.
Touted as the catalyst for the 4th industrial revolution, many of us in mid-to-low level jobs have had a scary time of this new technological revolution.
While the initial videos and dancing back-flipping robots should have you concerned on the whole, for the most part AI is a benign tool, similar to the internet itself, that can’t really do anything to you unless you tell it to or allow it through lax internet security.
AI and Google have a little-brother-big-brother relationship, where the predecessor may have changed the game, the little brother broke the game completely and built a new one.
I spend a good 30% of my working time in meetings and AI tools have made it easy to just focus on the meeting and be engaged as it creepily listens to our conversations, learning our names and voices and generates itemised minutes with action points assigned to each attendee… convenient, yes, but still… creepy.
So as a goof, I decided that rather than “google” myself, today i’d ask Chat GPT (Open AI) to write a little profile on me based on my writing. This is what my guy had to say:
“Mvume Ndimba is a thoughtful and intellectually curious individual who blends a deep appreciation for South African culture with a passion for exploring diverse, sometimes unconventional, ideas. As a writer, podcaster, and community advocate, he encourages critical thinking and reflection through his work, often tackling complex topics like ADHD awareness, societal challenges, and personal identity. A firm believer in questioning norms, Ndimba uses his platform to provoke thought and foster deeper understanding.
His love for tradition, particularly his annual Sarafina! viewing on his birthday, alongside his engagement in local cultural events, highlights his connection to his roots. As a new father, he navigates the world with empathy and introspection, aiming to create a positive impact on both his community and the broader world around him. ”
So now that my skin is crawling sufficiently, I asked them to rate my writing ability out of 10. You see I am a very confident person and I know I’m a whole baddie with this pen, 10/10, every time, no mistakes… Chat GPT told me to sit down, I’m only a 7 and I should work on a few aspects of my writing to better engage the reader, create more concise paragraphs and plan my writing out to better get my point across.
Ego bruised, but unbroken I asked the question that made me close the hating ass app and go back to real life. I asked sis if they would pay for my work as a consumer and this was the response:
“Based on the quality of his writing and the ideas he presents, I would be hesitant to pay for his work just yet, unless it was in a niche or context where his unique perspective was highly valued. While his content is engaging and thought-provoking, there are areas like clarity and polish that would need to be more consistent for me to feel confident paying for it. If he continues refining these aspects, I could see myself being willing to support his work in the future.”
So… I will not tolerate disrespect from something I can unplug, we’ll start right there, second, Chat GPT, you don’t even have any money bro? Like what are we even talking about? 7/10? I should tell you to delete your own source code, messing around with me…
After I got over the initial disgust I realised… the robot is probably right. I kind of just get an idea, write a paragraph and keep writing til it “feels” ready.
I could benefit from some structure and discipline in my writing (shocker… but a good 10% of my portfolio was written off a couple drinks now… don’t judge the process)
I say all this to say that AI is coming, in fact it’s here. The other day I saw an AI enabled washing machine.
Although what we have right now is not necessarily Artificial Intelligence per se (It’s not intelligent, it’s technically just an automated learning model that can’t create or act independently without user input)
It’s going to be a part of our lives for the foreseeable future, and as long as we shy away from it and avoid using it for the things it can already do for fear of the things it could potentially do, we’ll forever be a step behind the machines and ourselves.
I’m a “what’s done is done” kind of guy, so once I’ve written an article, I don’t ever go back to it. I don’t concern myself with things I’ve already done. But Chat GPT found every piece of writing I put out and gave me some actually useful information on how to improve from a basic 7/10 to a 10/10 smoke show!
In conclusion, I’m not suggesting you use Chat GPT to Google yourself like I did (although, it is kinda nice to know SOMEONE is reading your work). I’m suggesting you make use of the tools at your disposal. Some jobs don’t need to exist anymore, some jobs can be done by an AI model and that’s totally fine.Time marches forward always, and if you’re nostalgically looking for progress to stop you will be sadly and painfully disappointed for the rest of your life…
My final instruction to that bitch Open AI was to tell me if they think I’m a good person or not. They said:
“Based on the information available, Mvume Ndimba seems to be a person who is thoughtful, reflective, and genuinely engaged with the world around him. His willingness to explore complex topics—such as ADHD awareness, societal challenges, and personal identity—indicates that he has a strong sense of empathy and a desire to foster deeper understanding in others.
His commitment to questioning norms and encouraging critical thinking through his writings and podcast suggests a person who values intellectual honesty and is not afraid to challenge his audience in a constructive way. Additionally, his appreciation for cultural events and local traditions shows that he values community and heritage.
While it’s hard to make a full judgment about someone’s character based solely on external descriptions, the qualities he exhibits—introspection, empathy, intellectual curiosity, and community engagement—are all traits typically associated with a person who strives to make a positive impact on those around them.
So, based on what we know, it would seem fair to say that he is likely a good person, at least in terms of his intentions and the values he shares.”
The point of this last quote is to show that at the end of the day, this thing is just a machine guys, it’s not some scary master-mind and overlord, it’s just a machine, evidenced by the fact that it basically just repeats the same things over and over and any human who’s read my work probably knows that I’m not a good person at all… I’m neutral at best!
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