Born out of the loss of her own baby, a Gqeberha mother has embarked on a project which aims to bring hope to other mothers dealing with the grief of infant loss, 041Baby columnist Odette Parfitt chatted to her.
The Heart of Hope project was recently started by Christelle du Toit, partnering with her mother Christien Geel to assist mothers whose babies have passed away.
“I want these mothers to know they’re not alone,” explains Christelle. “After I lost my son, I realised just how many people go through this kind of loss and pain, but when you can share your story and talk to others who have been through this, there are more shoulders to carry the burden.”
Christelle’s journey to starting Heart of Hope – an idea based on the Hope Box initiative by Nanki Robbertse – began in 2023 when she lost her son Elan at the age of five days to a rare congenital heart defect. “I had the need to do something to honour his memory, but at first I was in the process of grieving and not in the mindset to start something like this. My mother, who was in the habit of crocheting blankets for all her grandchildren, made one for Elan as well, and she kept making blankets but didn’t know what to do with them.”
“Later, my sister brought me a Hope Box containing various items, including the book ‘Hope After Loss’ – this book was life-changing; in a time when I was lost and unable to explain to anyone what I was going through, the book put what I was feeling into words.”
This inspired Christelle to start a similar project, with boxes that also contain the book that meant so much to her. “Also included in the boxes we put together is a leaflet with a poem I wrote, a prayer that gave me comfort, and Elan’s story; a candle; and of course a crocheted blanket. We want the unique blankets to be a symbol of the uniqueness of the child that was lost.”
The project is still “small and intimate”, says Christelle, with a handful of mothers having already received their Heart of Hope boxes. “It was a strange sensation to hear [from Life St. George’s Hospital] that the first box had been given to someone; you are happy that you can help someone but you don’t want anyone to go through something that means they need this support.
“To us, the box is a memento to honour the lost child, but also a symbol of hope – hope of healing, hope of making sense of the loss and hope to continue with life after this loss.”
*To request assistance for a mother in need or to support this cause, visit the Heart of Hope Facebook page.
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